The Fertility Society of Australia states that one in six couples experiences infertility. From my personal experience and for many women in Early Menopause this can be one of the most challenging consequences of the condition. Of course not all women in Early Menopause are affected by infertility but for many it becomes a harsh and sometimes unexpected reality.

For women and couples experiencing infertility, whether it is related to Early Menopause or not, is usually a tough road for all involved. The options for becoming parents include Adoption, Fostering, IVF and Surrogacy. Of course, a child free life by choice and/or circumstance is also the life path for some. The AEMN has compiled the following website links that may be helpful in your quest to become parents following a diagnosis of Early Menopause as well as to support individuals building a child free life.

AEMN does not advocate any of the following organisations or processes as being better than another or having greater fertility success rates. It is purely a list of resources that may be of some help to individuals or couples.

You may also be interested in the following published article. Some excerpts from the unsolicited book © “When Becoming a Mum is Hard” by TMD have been included.

When Becoming a Mum is Hard ……… By TMD

We live in a parenting world and for many of us becoming a mum the good old fashioned way can be hard if not impossible.  Having fertility issues is like being a member of a club you’d rather not belong to.  While your peers are out and about furnishing the nursery, joining a mothers group or systemically reading through 101 baby names you are googling all hours of the night, desperate to understand why you’re having trouble conceiving.  Cyberspace is your gateway to connect with other experiencing the same thing.  It allows you to research varying types of medicines, procedures and ‘tips’ that may be the key to the egg and sperm doing what everyone else seems to be doing naturally, without a hitch!  When you’re not busy googling, you are attending an endless and all consuming stream of medical appointments, ironically in the offices of gynaecologists or fertility experts who seem to think that displaying hundreds if not thousands of photos of gorgeous babies that they’ve had a hand in creating and/or delivering is a helpful thing!

 For many members of this special club, the gift of a treasured baby arrives albeit with an investment of significant energy, medical intervention and money.  For others, they are destined to live a life without a biological child. Each period is a reminder that they are not pregnant.  The hope that this month it would happen is shattered. My story of infertility began when I was twelve and ended when I entered Early Menopause at thirty two years old.  It was a laborious, debilitating, insightful and challenging journey to Menopause and life without a baby.  The short story is that after twenty years of gynecological ill health my uterus was removed when I was thirty two and seven months later, my ovaries and cervix were gone. 

 I have met many women and couples struggling to have a baby for various reasons, some stories end happily and for others it’s a loss of a dream to painful to imagine.  Some are desperate to find a successful egg or sperm donor, others are looking for a surrogate, IVF is the dominant process for many and some have taken the option of joining the often long and bureaucratic process of adopting.  There’s no right or wrong, there’s just hard.  Nothing makes me sadder than seeing a loving couple or individual desperate to have a family in whatever way they can, yet there seems to be a roadblock at every corner or a never ending list of factors that are out of their control.  There seems to be no rhyme or reason why some fertility treatments work for some and not others.  Everybody has their story but at the end of the day fertility difficulty is fertility difficulty, pain is pain, loss is loss and pregnant is pregnant.

So if you’re journey to becoming a parent was relatively easy, hug your children tight.  Be reminded of the gift they are to you and that for many others the road to parenthood may require them to take unexpected detours, an entirely different route than planned or an unwanted arrival at a dead end.  To those of you that continue to wait, unsure if the donor will come through, if the IVF process will be a success, whether your adoption will be granted or if your life will be childless, remember that there are many other members of the fertility challenged club that feel both your hope and your pain.  You will get through it and you are not alone.